You remember seeing the movies where someone enters a prison cell to find a series of "tick marks" (usually in bundles of five) on the wall. Sometimes I thought it might have been the prisoner's way of keeping track of the days until he or she was released. I think I am discovering that it was a way to keep from becoming confused or disconnected.
Memory is a tricky thing. Certainly it can be trained and improved, but natural memory is interesting. It never ceases to amaze me what "sticks" in a person's memory and what does not. Years ago, Lucy's mother worked with a special needs Sunday School class in El Paso. I still remember one young lady from the class. Every time we met she could tell me all the significant dates in my life (birthday, anniversary, etc). She was told once and they stuck.
I make it a habit of not remembering things that I can access in other ways. I remember our home telephone number here (because I call it) but do not remember my GSM/Mobile Phone number because I never call myself. I talk to myself a lot but never have to use the phone. If I need to know my GSM number I know where to look it up. I remember faces but have to force myself to remember names. Lucy and Megan think my head is full of trivia because of the things I do remember. Ha Ha, fooled them, my head is so empty that thoughts accelerate as they enter and leave faster than arriving.
What I could do was always remember what needed to be done on what date. As a strategic thinker, I could think in process and have a mental flow chart of what needed to be done when and next. For the most part, the monthly and yearly calendar ahead was fixed in my mind. It was just there. I did not have to force it in, I just saw it in my mind. I remembered which balls I had thrown in the air and in what order. It was a kind of strategic juggling.
But now I find myself locked in the prison of sameness. Life seems so much about dealing with the now that the future is a blur. I think I need some form of mental tick marks to keep track of process and progress. For strategic thinkers only living in the now is frightening, confusing, aggravating and produces a feeling of being disconnected with the world and reality as you normally see and perceive it. I need some tick marks to remind me where I am. But are there tick marks to remind you what you need to do next? Strategic thinkers never need them, they are just wired into our brains.
When I was young I never needed to be disciplined to exercise. I played sports and worked in physical jobs so I was in good shape without the discipline. I did not have to plan an exercise program, life provided it. Now I have to plan to do my running and make an effort to do that. It is not built in and certainly not a natural desire. I have to actively stuff it into my mind.
For now my greatest need, desire and point of discomfort is there is no natural sense of process and what needs to be done. I do not remember if I have thrown balls into the air, I do not naturally remember what needs to be done next week or next month. So if you see me going around confused it is because I have not found a way to do my mental tick marks.
We have to balance Jesus' advice to not have concern about tomorrow with His admonition to count the cost. The ways that worked in the past are not effective or available now. How do you scribe tick marks in the mind?
Random thoughts. If you have an other evaluation, you may be correct as well.
Memory is a tricky thing. Certainly it can be trained and improved, but natural memory is interesting. It never ceases to amaze me what "sticks" in a person's memory and what does not. Years ago, Lucy's mother worked with a special needs Sunday School class in El Paso. I still remember one young lady from the class. Every time we met she could tell me all the significant dates in my life (birthday, anniversary, etc). She was told once and they stuck.
I make it a habit of not remembering things that I can access in other ways. I remember our home telephone number here (because I call it) but do not remember my GSM/Mobile Phone number because I never call myself. I talk to myself a lot but never have to use the phone. If I need to know my GSM number I know where to look it up. I remember faces but have to force myself to remember names. Lucy and Megan think my head is full of trivia because of the things I do remember. Ha Ha, fooled them, my head is so empty that thoughts accelerate as they enter and leave faster than arriving.
What I could do was always remember what needed to be done on what date. As a strategic thinker, I could think in process and have a mental flow chart of what needed to be done when and next. For the most part, the monthly and yearly calendar ahead was fixed in my mind. It was just there. I did not have to force it in, I just saw it in my mind. I remembered which balls I had thrown in the air and in what order. It was a kind of strategic juggling.
But now I find myself locked in the prison of sameness. Life seems so much about dealing with the now that the future is a blur. I think I need some form of mental tick marks to keep track of process and progress. For strategic thinkers only living in the now is frightening, confusing, aggravating and produces a feeling of being disconnected with the world and reality as you normally see and perceive it. I need some tick marks to remind me where I am. But are there tick marks to remind you what you need to do next? Strategic thinkers never need them, they are just wired into our brains.
When I was young I never needed to be disciplined to exercise. I played sports and worked in physical jobs so I was in good shape without the discipline. I did not have to plan an exercise program, life provided it. Now I have to plan to do my running and make an effort to do that. It is not built in and certainly not a natural desire. I have to actively stuff it into my mind.
For now my greatest need, desire and point of discomfort is there is no natural sense of process and what needs to be done. I do not remember if I have thrown balls into the air, I do not naturally remember what needs to be done next week or next month. So if you see me going around confused it is because I have not found a way to do my mental tick marks.
We have to balance Jesus' advice to not have concern about tomorrow with His admonition to count the cost. The ways that worked in the past are not effective or available now. How do you scribe tick marks in the mind?
Random thoughts. If you have an other evaluation, you may be correct as well.
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